Parenting: 5 Ways to Show Love to Your Children

1. Spend time with your kids. We spell love L-O-V-E. Children and teens spell it T-I-M-E. The myth that the quality of time is more important than the quantity of time spent with children is just that - a myth.

We would not buy this lie if a surgeon told us, "I was not able to spend as much time as I would have liked on your surgery, but the few moments I did spend was really quality time."

We want both quantity and quality. So do our kids. I've worked with many people who have provided everything for their children except themselves. How nice and big your house looks from the outside is much less important to your kids than how it feels to be on the inside of your home.

One of the best ways to spend time with your children is to let them lead. Set aside the time, and then do what they would like to do. Let them lead. You could find yourself doing things that look funny, but so what?

Set dates with your children. Block out a chunk of time, and protect it just as you would an important business meeting.

2. Discipline your children. Discipline is not just spanking or grounding, though there is a place for both. Disciplining is loving correction. If you are not able or are not willing to discipline your children, you might consider whether you really do love them. Disciplining your kids is not fun, but it is love.

The child who grows up in an anything-goes, my-kid-can-do-no-wrong kind of home grows up with weak choice muscles when it comes to right and wrong. Teach your kids the difference between making good choices and making bad choices. You make bad choices, and bad things happen; make good choices, and good things happen. Teach this and model this, because it's the real world.

3. Show your kids how the world works. Most of the successful people I know have had someone in their lives teach them how the world works.

Three of the most important things we need to know and are taught so little about are:

how to have a successful love relationship;

how to be an effective parent;

and how to make and manage money.

If you don't know how to teach these things, then learn how. Showing your children how the world works demonstrates love because it imparts values to them. If you don't do it, there are plenty of people in the world who will, but they may have an agenda that does not include the best interests of your children.

4. Love your spouse. The first place your kids learn how to love another person is by watching you. Do your kids see affection or disrespect?

5. Watch your words. The words we speak to our children can be encouraging or discouraging, a blessing or a curse. I've worked with many clients whose entire self-image was centered on what their parents told them about themselves.

I know competent people who deep down believe they are losers because they were told so by their parents. A single word or phrase can last a lifetime.

If you have spoken words that were less than a blessing to your children, clean it up. Apologize. Have the conversation. Tell them you do not see them that way, and then show them that you don't.

If you are having trouble finding words to bless your children, start with: "I'm so glad you are my child, because ..." and then go from there. It's also important to back up your words with actions.

Visit SecretsofGreatRelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.

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Hair Loss Factors

What are the factors that contribute to hair loss? I know I have friends and relative that have suffered hair loss, but they are so different. As I checked into it farther, I found that there are a lot of factors that can contribute to hair loss. Some are natural and others are not caused by natural factors. It seems that there are as many hair loss factors as there are individuals. However, there are some main factors that contribute to a majority of cases.

Perhaps the most common factor in hair loss is genetics. Likely when you hear the words “hair loss,” you think of male pattern baldness. To be fair, it is probably the most common form of hair loss. Male pattern baldness is greatly affected by genetics. The genes can be carried on both the mother’s side of the family and the father’s. Some men will even start to lose their hair by their late teens or early 20’s. Genetics is one of the most powerful factors when it comes to hair loss, but make no mistake, there are plenty of other factors that can contribute.

Another factor that can cause hair loss, though to a lesser extent, is high levels of stress. If a person, male or females, is experiencing high levels of continual stress, they will sometimes begin to lose their hair. A classic historical example is that of Roger Maris as he pursued Babe Ruth’s single season home run record. As the pressure mounted and he approached the record, Maris began to lose the hair on his head in chunks. The only reason for this hair loss was the stress he was experiencing. Stress is a powerful force, but some don’t realize it is powerful enough to cause people to lose their hair.

A third factor in hair loss, and one that is, sadly, becoming more common is cancer treatment. Sometimes cancers are treated via chemotherapy. That means radiation is used to kill the infected cells. A common side effect of this treatment is hair loss. The radiation cannot magically attack only the cancer cells, so the body does end up reacting to the radiation all over. Often this includes a mal function of the hair follicles causing the hair loss. Fortunately for those who are lucky enough to recover, the hair generally grows back when the therapy has concluded.

In experiencing day to day life, you likely see people suffering from hair loss. Those people also likely vary in race, age, sex, and lifestyle, so what are the factors of their hair loss. The truth is that the factors causing hair loss are as varied as the people losing their hair. There are however, certain common factors that are found across the board: genetics, stress, and chemotherapy are just three of the more common of those reasons. In the end, those who suffer from hair loss must conclude the cause of their problem and decide on the best treatment for their particular situation.

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